Comments on: I Choose to Rebel http://therrysays.com/2008/02/i-choose-to-rebel/ Notes of My Life Wed, 08 Feb 2012 06:08:47 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Therry http://therrysays.com/2008/02/i-choose-to-rebel/comment-page-1/#comment-331 Therry Mon, 11 Feb 2008 12:47:00 +0000 http://therrysays.com/2008/02/04/i-choose-to-rebel/#comment-331 @Elyani:<br/><br/>Hi, welcome back! <br/><br/>Actually... out of all the grandchildren that my grandfather has, I was the only one who actually approached and talked to him.<br/><br/>During those talks I also found out he was (unfortunately) very conservative-minded and quite dominant in his role as the eldest of the family.<br/><br/>I think he still treated me like a little girl he used to think I was, because I was the first granddaughter he had back then. <br/><br/>Thanks for the encouragement, Elyani :) @Elyani:

Hi, welcome back!

Actually… out of all the grandchildren that my grandfather has, I was the only one who actually approached and talked to him.

During those talks I also found out he was (unfortunately) very conservative-minded and quite dominant in his role as the eldest of the family.

I think he still treated me like a little girl he used to think I was, because I was the first granddaughter he had back then.

Thanks for the encouragement, Elyani :)

]]> By: Elyani http://therrysays.com/2008/02/i-choose-to-rebel/comment-page-1/#comment-330 Elyani Mon, 11 Feb 2008 12:15:00 +0000 http://therrysays.com/2008/02/04/i-choose-to-rebel/#comment-330 Therry, calm down ... I can easily understand how this would happen. From your story, your grandpa has been the driving force in your family. Like it or not, much of his life has been spent caring for his children and grand-children. Your mother surely has the heaviest load here and I'm sure it causes her a great deal of stress. To make grandpa understand - try to spend a little time with him, am sure you could make a few minor changes in his views. Good luck! Therry, calm down … I can easily understand how this would happen. From your story, your grandpa has been the driving force in your family. Like it or not, much of his life has been spent caring for his children and grand-children. Your mother surely has the heaviest load here and I’m sure it causes her a great deal of stress. To make grandpa understand – try to spend a little time with him, am sure you could make a few minor changes in his views. Good luck!

]]> By: Therry http://therrysays.com/2008/02/i-choose-to-rebel/comment-page-1/#comment-297 Therry Wed, 06 Feb 2008 14:50:00 +0000 http://therrysays.com/2008/02/04/i-choose-to-rebel/#comment-297 @John Doe:<br/><br/>Hey John welcome back :) <br/><br/>I personally think the 1st point is ridiculous; it indicates that no relationship is secure unless it is bonded in marriage, unfortunately this is what most Indonesians think.<br/><br/>I even had a friend whose mother actually urged her to get married, despite her being ready or not. More ironically was that she once confided to me that she didn't trust her fiance 100%, but she got hitched anyway, in thinking that after tying the knot her trust issues could disappear. <br/><br/>when I read your word on 'grab that good guy ASAP' I felt like I was hailing a cab that might or might not stop, as if saying, "There you go! Hail it!! Ooops... to bad..you missed it.." He3x. I got that from Sex and The City, actually.<br/><br/>Nevertheless, his motive was probably of a noble one (he just wanted me to be happy) but he had all the wrong reasons and actions in communicating that with me. @John Doe:

Hey John welcome back :)

I personally think the 1st point is ridiculous; it indicates that no relationship is secure unless it is bonded in marriage, unfortunately this is what most Indonesians think.

I even had a friend whose mother actually urged her to get married, despite her being ready or not. More ironically was that she once confided to me that she didn’t trust her fiance 100%, but she got hitched anyway, in thinking that after tying the knot her trust issues could disappear.

when I read your word on ‘grab that good guy ASAP’ I felt like I was hailing a cab that might or might not stop, as if saying, “There you go! Hail it!! Ooops… to bad..you missed it..” He3x. I got that from Sex and The City, actually.

Nevertheless, his motive was probably of a noble one (he just wanted me to be happy) but he had all the wrong reasons and actions in communicating that with me.

]]> By: John Doe http://therrysays.com/2008/02/i-choose-to-rebel/comment-page-1/#comment-293 John Doe Wed, 06 Feb 2008 05:40:00 +0000 http://therrysays.com/2008/02/04/i-choose-to-rebel/#comment-293 1. Perhaps he wants to see his grand-daughter marry a good guy ? Knowing you and your b/f are pretty much financially independent (and intelligent), maybe he's just afraid you might loose him. But then again, you can also twist/view this argument the other way around: that is: your grandfather is insecure of how faithful your b/f to you that he needs to lock both of you in a marriage. But my point is: there is a possibility that he thinks you should grab that good guy ASAP, just for security.<br/><br/>2. Perhaps he wants to set you two (you and your b/f) as an example, a good one for your aunties and uncles ? A message of: "Look at what the next generation is capable of, you should be ashamed of you current state of life."<br/><br/>3. Perhaps it is an indication that you are being backed, despite the racial prejudice ? Or simply to indicate a positive change of mind, like you said: "to touchy issues like racial prejudice based on the color of my boyfriend's skin"<br/><br/>4. Perhaps it's a combination of all the above ?<br/><br/>The reason(s) of why I'm saying all the above is:<br/>- I may have overlooked, but I have yet to read/find the reason behind your grandfather's request to fast-track the whole thing.<br/>- If his reason is a noble one, it would be a very sad misunderstanding between you two. It is perhaps something you can solve by finding his true intention.<br/>- If his reason is ill-fated or simply senseless, then it's all yours to challenge his/their ideas: to prove your points, to debate your principality. If he/any member of your family totally dismiss your arguments, it's even more reason for you to further prove your point and justify your decision to rebel.<br/><br/>I may be awfully wrong in my deductions above, and if I am -- and if I offended you in anyway: I apologise~ as of course: I have never known you nor your family and who am I to judge ? 1. Perhaps he wants to see his grand-daughter marry a good guy ? Knowing you and your b/f are pretty much financially independent (and intelligent), maybe he’s just afraid you might loose him. But then again, you can also twist/view this argument the other way around: that is: your grandfather is insecure of how faithful your b/f to you that he needs to lock both of you in a marriage. But my point is: there is a possibility that he thinks you should grab that good guy ASAP, just for security.

2. Perhaps he wants to set you two (you and your b/f) as an example, a good one for your aunties and uncles ? A message of: “Look at what the next generation is capable of, you should be ashamed of you current state of life.”

3. Perhaps it is an indication that you are being backed, despite the racial prejudice ? Or simply to indicate a positive change of mind, like you said: “to touchy issues like racial prejudice based on the color of my boyfriend’s skin”

4. Perhaps it’s a combination of all the above ?

The reason(s) of why I’m saying all the above is:
- I may have overlooked, but I have yet to read/find the reason behind your grandfather’s request to fast-track the whole thing.
- If his reason is a noble one, it would be a very sad misunderstanding between you two. It is perhaps something you can solve by finding his true intention.
- If his reason is ill-fated or simply senseless, then it’s all yours to challenge his/their ideas: to prove your points, to debate your principality. If he/any member of your family totally dismiss your arguments, it’s even more reason for you to further prove your point and justify your decision to rebel.

I may be awfully wrong in my deductions above, and if I am — and if I offended you in anyway: I apologise~ as of course: I have never known you nor your family and who am I to judge ?

]]> By: Therry http://therrysays.com/2008/02/i-choose-to-rebel/comment-page-1/#comment-290 Therry Tue, 05 Feb 2008 15:23:00 +0000 http://therrysays.com/2008/02/04/i-choose-to-rebel/#comment-290 @aroengbinang: <br/><br/>Always the Wise Dude ... :) @aroengbinang:

Always the Wise Dude … :)

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