It’s an Indonesian Thing
To gloat about how rich they are despite the fact that they are unable to queue in line or address people politely regardless their status, jobs and looks.
To practice “Siapa Cepat Dia Dapat” policy in almost every aspect of their lives. No matter how much discomfort they’ve caused to others.
To be selfish is a good thing. The more selfish, the better. To be exact, it’s the way Indonesians always adapt the attitude of “Fuck off, everyone, I’m an Indonesian and my business is way more important than anybody elses”.
And yet Indonesians are supposed to be famous for their tolerance and courteous behavior towards other. At least that’s what I’ve been brainwashed since I was little.
But tolerable? Really?
I mean, for all I know, Indonesians have become the rudest, most selfish people who give me the shits I hardly look forward to get out of the house without thinking the chance that someone will give me hell – either while driving, or queuing in the bank or simply walking down the road and having to avoid being sexually harassed by a low-life geezer.
Well the author of the article I quoted below was on to something there. The original article was found here. Read it – you’ll have an epiphany. Or not.
Getting a kick out of being Indonesian
Many Indonesians would put “tolerance” at the top of their lists of “national” characteristics.
Tolerance usually means that we tolerate differences, though I personally think it is more applicable to our ability to tolerate the harshest conditions, most notably poverty.
For example, Javanese use the expression “fortunately, I still have my life” in just about every tragic situation that confronts them. This shows we count our blessings.
The late author Mochtar Lubis wrote a list detailing the bad characteristics specific to Indonesians. Included were: Hypocritical, irresponsible, feudalistic, superstitious, extravagant and violent.
On his list of good characteristics, he included helpful, kind-hearted, peaceful, able to show a sense of humor amid hardship, fast learners, easily trained and patient.
How do foreigners perceive us? Our foreign guests are too polite to tell us all the bad things they notice. But I recently came across a list titled “You know you’ve been in Indonesia too long if…” on an Internet web site run by expatriates living in Jakarta.
As long-time residents of this country, expatriates make far better judges of our characters than those who make short visits to the country.
I won’t go into details of the list — just Google it yourself and have a good laugh at the 60-plus characteristics of Indonesians as determined by expatriates.
Instead I’ll just pick out my favorite: “You know you’ve been in Indonesia too long if it has become exciting to see if you can get on the lift (elevator) before anybody else can get off.”
A quick visit to any of Jakarta’s numerous office buildings or malls will somewhat confirm that many if not most people would rather force their way into an elevator before letting those inside get off first.
You would have thought most people would have learned by now that such behavior creates unnecessary jams and discomfort.
Discourteous? Perhaps. Fear of not getting a spot in the elevator? Doubtful. The same thing happens in off-peak hours at malls and office buildings when there is plenty of space in the elevator for everyone.
The expatriates aren’t all that wrong when they say some of us actually get excitement out of doing this. We (or some of us) do it just for the hell of it, to create discomfort for others.
Is this phenomenon specific to Indonesians? Apparently so. I searched for a similar list for other countries and found many, including on Japan, Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand and Korea. But they have their own set of peculiarities, and none are related to behavior when getting on and off elevators.
During a recent trip to Malaysia, I was relieved to see a couple sneak into a hotel elevator as the doors were opening.
So, this is a Malay thing, not Indonesian, I thought. But no sooner than the elevator had started moving up, the couple began speaking, to my dismay, in very distinct Javanese accents.
What excitement do you get out of creating such discomfort? That’s really for you to decide. One piece of advice: Just do it once. It can become addictive.
– Eric Musa Piliang
14 comments
Jadi inget kalo naik pesawat antar kota di Indonesia, tuh belon mendarat udah tat tit tut hape dinyalakan. Emang sih ada perdebatan kalo hape itu benernya berbahaya gak sih, tapi mbok ya…tunggu sampe bener2 landing kenapa sih….saking gak sabarnya.
Eh jangankan penerbangan antar kota, penerbangan Amsterdam-Jakarta yang penumpangnya 70% orang Indonesia (yang educated, yang tinggal di Eropa) aja masih begitu…kacau
I beg to differ with the above author. This issue is a never-ending comparison/claim. I think rude people can be found everywhere all over the world. He is right to certain extent but he cannot generalise all just because some expats say so. What will the expats say when they watch a live show like Jerry Springer? is that what we call “civilised” people??? If they know Indnesians are so rude and have all the negative things that make them want to puke, why on earth they like to stay here? Don’t they realise they are treated like kings here? Just go to any establishment like hotels, cafes etc and see who will get a better treatment here, Indonesian or expats?
I rarely got people cut into my line at the bank or at the train station when I queue up for a train ticket because there’s a queue line there. Some banks like Danamon or Mandiri even use queue card number so you don’t have to worry people will cut into your path.
There are still the courteous in our society, like someone who stopped his car and sent me home when my purse got snatched inside the running bajaj. A guy in warung rokok who helped me got my house padlock opened when my pembantu left the key inside the house. I take my life so simple. I’m rude to the people who are rude. but I will be nice to the people who are nice.
I partially agree with the writer, but also with elyani. I see rude people here too, but rarely Belgians. Most rude people here are immigrants from poor countries. And seeing as Indonesia is a third world country, it is not surprising that this kinds of attitude can be found in Indonesia, easily.
I’m not saying it’s right, but we sure do have a culture of “me, me, me” or as stump said, “all for one, all for me”
In developed countries, conscience is a bit thicker, as is morality and shame (of being without manners)
It is a sad fact, but many Indonesians are without manners, but when the country (if ever) becomes a developed and manages to educate its people, then maybe these kinds of thing will become a thing of the past.
It’s Sunday and Im feeling a bit optimistic. So, sue me… lol
But things like this happen everywhere they, although here, when people insist to go in a lift of the metro without waiting for those coming off to get out first, they will suffer the stare and scold of shame from the others. So even the poor and dirty immigrants sooner or later lean not to do that.
After all, a dog learns not to do something when it’s scolded or when it’s rewarded, I would think humans can have at least the same kind of intelligence, if not more..
it’s always funny when the cabin attendant in the airplane is saying, “please don’t turn on your cellphone until you’re in the…” and there’s always a phone going BEEP BEEP. and i ALWAYS can’t help but say, “dasarrrrr gak ngerti bahasa indo!”
apparently, kiasuism is everywhere…
Therry…
Your next post should be an explicit and detailed account of what happened recently (if the list is not too long) that triggered these last couple of posts.
There is truth in all the comments and there is always some degree of truth in a generalizations.
I partly agree with Elyani and partly disagree with her. Not all expats here are treated like kings. This presupposes that all expats are here on expat salaries and with expat conditions. My guess is that perhaps some of the Indonesians that comment in Therry’s blog are on salaries larger than mine.
The generalizations that all Indonesians are rude an ill-mannered is also a generalization. I would make the generalization the other way, in that the majority of Indonesians I meet are in fact helpful.
Indonesia is what it is. The reason expats stay is despite all the things that bug them overall they enjoy being here. And when push comes to shove there are probably an equally large number of things that bug them about their countries of origin. You just tend to forget or minimize these over time.
The mobile phones on plane things is just one of the plane related stupidities that one sees. The other is where the bloke who has seat 49C whacks his carry on baggage in the overhead locker above seat 10C. Whenever I get a seat in row 10 -15 and there is no one sitting in these seats but the overhead lockers are full, then I just empty the carry on luggage out and sit in the aisle and then let the flight attendants deal with it. There has certainly been some scenes prior to take off.
It is the richness of the experience of living in Indonesia that makes it fun. Yet, one can enjoy the richness in life wherever they might be whether it be Denmark, Belgium, Australia, the UK, the US, or wherever, even when the minority who are rude and arrogant raise their ugly noggins and disturb our otherwise good day!
rima is right. I observed that it is usually immigrants who don’t know manners / rude here. The other day I was queueing nicely to pay the thing I bought from the ten-kroner shop when this Chinese / Thai / Asian lady just cut in front of me. Unfortunately the Danes are not famous for their scolding so the cashier was a bit confused until I told this woman to queue.
Another story is when these people (mostly immigrants and sadly most of them are Asians) are crowding in front of the train door blocking passengers who want to get out just because they want to get in first, and this is just ordinary train that runs every 5 minutes.
Meanwhile, El, you are also right. There are rude people around the world and not just in Indonesia but like what the article said about the elevator story, I experienced this way too often. It’s really annoying and I curse a lot and sometimes I tell them that what they do is bothering other people then they would say “maaf, silahkan” well, well do we have to scold them every time to make them understand that?
….and I also think Rob is right. Expats tend to bitch about their host country. Not because they don’t like it, it’s just because they tend to compare what’s here and what’s there back home. It’s purely normal. People might think what I was bitching about when I live in this peaceful, low crime place. There’s always something to bitch on and in a way it’s good to vent out the frustration because no matter how nice a new place is, it won’t be the same with the one we left behind.
So, it’s all human nature. But it’s true that some Indonesians need to attend a course about basic manners.
Like everybody says: Jerks and assholes are everywhere
I believe all country have their fair share of rude people — I have lost count how many times someone cut into the lane I was in when driving on Flinders Street during peak hours.
Some are even worse: I was driving, and stopped before the traffic light even though it was green because the intersection was not clear yet. Then that jerk from the right hand side of the lane I was in — speed off, crossed the intersection and took the supposedly the space where I could have been. And instead, the traffic light turns red and I have to wait again.
Another situation: when I was around Preston, Mebourne — a granny looked lost, and wandering around the street~ I approached her and asked whether she needs help w/ directions. She was mumbling something I couldn’t hear and thus I asked her: “Sorry ma’am, I didn’t catch that.” To which she replied me: “You’re useless !” then pushed me away.
But what about situations where you’re caught between insulting a person and being courteous ? Picture this: in a public transports, a pregnant woman having to stand w/o anyone even try to offer her seat. When interviewed by a newspaper about this, one of the teenager replied: “It’s not that I’m being rude, it’s just that I wasn’t sure whether the lady was genuinely pregnant or simply fat. Had it been the latter, it would be insulting.”
yup…i guess rude people are just about everywhere. I went to China once and i personally think I’ve never met people more rude than there. Same as for HK but in these 2 countries, I won’t say all are rude. I’ve met a great deal of f friendly people too and let me tell u, they are so friendly that it would make you feel ashamed of yourself. So, yes, every countries have their fair share of rude and friendly people. I would hope no one generalized that all Indonesians are the same just because they met many rude people here…. maybe they need to meet me to know how friendly Indonesian can be
*tersenyum lebar* huahaha
sepertinya sudah sering dikecewakan orang indonesia yah? heartbroken by indonesian?
LOL at John Doe’s last paragraph.
(my friends were ROTFL)
The other day I stepped into a crowded train, and I was wearing a dress that made me look particularly fat in the belly. So I was standing there, chatting with my friend, when 5 seconds later I felt someone tapping my shoulder. I turned around and this lady gave up her seat for me!!! I promptly rejected her offer
Many people mistakenly label Indonesians as tolerant, when actually what they see is people being intolerant with each other. So the culture is one in which people impose on each other–one does what one likes regardless of how others feel about it, because one knows that one will be subjected to the actions of others intolerant about one’s feelings.
It is reciprocal intolerance, and has nothing to do with being rude or nice.
One may mistakenly identify an act as being rude simply because the act is unfamiliar, and therefore one does (did) not have the opportunity to impose such act on others–alas, short end of the stick. Understandably, foreigners feel they are often at the receiving end of rudeness.
It is all very rational.
I don’t really notice all the above, save the queue bit. Indonesians cannot do queue. I don’t really understand why.
Indeed it’s the most bizarre portion of our vanity parade. This “characteristic” is pretty much taken for granted.
Indonesians, tolerant? What’s next, North Koreans are democratic? Americans are on a healthy diet? Saudi Arabians are matriarchal? Does it get any more surreal?
Wow, so much stereotyping
Can I then say that it’s also an Indonesian ‘quality’ of generalizing and to stereotype ?
Whoops… that means I just did !
- I’m an Indonesian
- I just generalized that generalizing is so Indonenesian~ like: totally !
Indonesians think that it’s such a great achievement to “break” the law or common social rules. Such as queuing, trashing, and even bribing. They would gloat about it afterwards.
Mr Idiot : “Hey, there was a long line at Carrefour today. I cut off the line and paid in less than 5 minutes. How cool was I?”
Friends of Mr Idiot : “Wowww!”
The next day, everybody starts doing the same thing. At the end of the day, nobody queues. Since queuing is so boring, and it won’t “wow” anybody.